Lot o' time on my hands....

My life is just never the same, never really "boring" or normal.  FG spent nearly 3 weeks in S. America completely out of communication.  He lived on a boat in Brazil on a tributary of the Amazon for 7 days.  Then he was able to email me a bit after he had been gone for 10 days and they were en route to Uruguay.  There he lived in a remote fishing resort, if you can call it that, for another 7 days.  Then due to volcanic ash in the air from a volcano errupting in Chile, he was delayed getting home and had to fly to Argentina to get a flight back.  A little crazy?  Yeah. A little nerve-wracking for me?  Yeah!
The day he was supposed to come home but was delayed, I lost my job.  The Bitch fired me!  Well, actually, she made some really stupid business decisions and couldn't afford to pay me any more.  She cried. She hugged me a little too long. She had the balls to ask me to take care of a project after she let me go.  I did it because I cared about where the project was going and who else it would affect.  I'm not the type to take my toys and go home.  So I followed through but I charged her mileage for driving down there & back to take care of it.  So there! 
Now I'm looking for work.  I've found something very part time and low paying.  I'm thinking of getting my substitute teacher license to supplement.  Then I also interviewed for a very promising FULL TIME job.  Ey yi yi.  Am I crazy?  I'm going to have heavy shoulders of guilt.  I won't be here when my kids get on the bus in the morning - FG will.  I won't be here when my kids get off the bus in the afternoon - Grandma (hopefully) or FG will or they will have to go to the after-school program a few days a week.  I don't know why I'm stressing so much about it, I haven't been offered the job!  But the positives will have to outweigh the negatives.  The job will be interesting and it sure would be nice to have things like a good paycheck and benefits.  FG promised me that with that good paycheck we would start having fun again instead of stressing about every cent going to a bill.  So just tell me that my kids will be ok if I end up getting the job, alright?  The part time gig that I am supposed to start next week just doesn't really interest me.  Yeah, it's super flexible and it's easy but it's not interesting to me.  I have a project I'm supposed to start working on this week and I don't have an ounce of motivation to do it.  I think I'm too focused on the full time thing and if it happens all the changes it will bring to our lives.  I can't wrap my head around anything else except how I will have to do certain things differently - silly things like packing lunches and laundry. 

Wish me luck.  I'll be sure to post the outcome.  It's going to be awhile, unfortunately.  The job is corporate so there's all that corporate bullshit to deal with to get hired.  I am definitely qualifed and I know the manager I would report to.  I know a few of the co-workers I would have too.  That's how I got in there in the first place - it came to me.  After I met with them last week, they pulled the job posting off their website.  That's a good sign for somebody and honestly, I'm hoping it's me.

Side notes:  Both kids are doing excellent in school.  DS is having a 1000x better year than last and his teacher is great.  His report card was an amazing 2 A's & 3 B's.  For him, that's awesome.  He saved up enough $ so we went and bought him his ipod touch as his reward.  He paid for it but we decided he earned it.  DD is too freaking smart.  She's also boy crazy.  And boys are crazy for her.  Oh help me.  She's a very tall, blond boy-crazy girl.  She's reading and writing well above her grade level.  Math, poor girl. She is so like me.  She is doing fine in math but it's work.   And the best news, FG doesn't have any crazy trips planned for awhile.  Hopefully not until next spring.  Next up are Nepal, Vietnam and Ireland again.  They talked about Columbia but I don't want him going there.  Or Russia to some crazy remote place where they have to fly them in on military helicopters.  For 2 hours.  Nope.  I'm going to protest those two as much as I can!  They just aren't going to tourist spots!

Truth is, you can go home again

Either that or time travel really does exist. 

Long long ago in a place, well right here, I worked in the advertising business.  I spent a shit-load of money and got spoiled like crazy.  I literally was wined and dined and I put out - the ad budgets of my clients. I worked a super small agency, a long standing large agency and a long standing even larger agency before I left it all for the glamor of being a SAHM.

Now with my "new" job (I've passed the 6 mo. mark, it doesn't feel so new anymore as I get frustrated and really enjoy my days off and some of the excitement has definitely worn off), I'm back in the game.  It really is all a game.  Now I'm not in the large fancy-schmancy agency with the staff and memos and lunch brought in for meetings regularly, but I don't have quite as much pressure as I used to.  I really like the fact I can come & go and my boss trusts that I will get it done.  She keeps giving me more & more to do and I keep getting it done so obviously I can handle it. 

Last night was a local TV station event to showcase their new fall lineup of programming.  Because one of the businesses I market is a chocolate store where we make everything possible out of chocolate, I called up my old sales rep and offered to do a little trade.  I was thinking holiday client gifts but they wanted give-aways for their premier party.  So I went to the party to network and be proud of the fact we re-created their logo in chocolate for each guest to take home.  They looked great, if I do say so myself.  And yes, I helped design them and made our kitchen staff re-do several of them because they were not perfect enough for me.

I wasn't nervous to go to the party.  I had been to plenty of them in the past.  Sure it had been over 10 years and the last one I attended I had a big round belly to show off and I couldn't drink wine (lots of drinks flow at these things).  My boss planned to go with me but as I figured, when it came down to it, she forgot and couldn't make it.  Bummer for me because I figured she could learn a thing or two about who she's not paying enough to do all that I do and have the knowledge I have.  Not trying to toot my own horn but yeah, she's got it good with me sitting in the next office.  (I have it good with my loose schedule and the fact I do something from home, keep track of the hours and she never questions it).

I walked through the doors of the museum and stepped into a time machine.  My old reps were there, my former boss was there, various colleagues I had attended what felt like a gazilion similar events were there.  I got a lot of "Oh my gosh!  It's great to see you!  What are you doing now?"  and I got several quizical looks with the "I'm so sorry, I KNOW that I know you but I can't place..."  until I said my name and they went "Oh my God! " after I barely got out my first name.  Then there was always a memory or story brought out, "Do you remember....".  EVERY SINGLE PERSON there was around when I was in the business 10 1/2 years ago.  It was freaky.

When I left advertising I said I would never be back.  Sort of like a teenager leaving home but they always come back around, don't they?

I'm still alive

Very very much alive.  Very very much busy.  Yeah yeah, I know that's terrible grammar.  Get off my back. I'm going crazy here!

Summer is half over - wahhhhhh!
Since I've been good with bullets, here's some more if you care to get caught up.

• FG got a new gig.  It sort of fell in his lap with 2 weeks notice to be out of the country on a project for 2 weeks.  He is now producing a new show that involves fishing and travel.  So he went to Ireland for 2 weeks to work.  Right now he's in the Northwest on some lake following the guys around.  In October he's going to the Amazon. As in the RIVER for 2 weeks.  Next spring, back to Ireland and then a month or so later he's going to Nepal.  They will be bunking with some buddist monks.  And he GETS PAID to do this.  Frickin' amazing.
• My job is going along swimmingly.  My boss loves me.  I do the job well and I work hard for the 4 businesses I'm doing marketing for.  It's amazing what I can get done in 15 hours a week and just how much 15 hours a week pulls me away from other things.  I do not miss the toystore one tiny bit!  I heard the manager was badmouthing me.  Yeah, probably because I busted her for being a grouch and was sick of her shit so I left.  I heard business is really slow and it doesn't surprise me at all.  They have the wrong person in there as manager.
• I pulled the kids out of school a week early and we flew to the midwest.  My cousin got married.  I'm the oldest cousin by 15 years so they have always been little kids in my mind.  Now they are in their early 20's and getting married.  Freaked me out when one of them got me a beer.  Then we spent a week in N. WI where I grew up vacationing.  My kids LOVED it.  They keep asking to go back. I thought for sure DD would hate every second of it but she decided to prove me wrong and adore fishing!
• DD and I flew home to finally see FG (our trips overlapped so we went 4 weeks without seeing each other).  DS stayed behind.  He couldn't get us on the plane fast enough and have his aunts all to himself.  I can't blame him, I did the same thing as a kid. I spent all summer with my grandmas and my aunts.  DS stayed 99.9% of the time with my aunt who is his favorite person on earth. 
• DD went to Girl Scout camp in the middle of the woods.  FG and I kept driving and looking at each other like, "Are we seriously leaving our 6 year old here?!"  She couldn't wait to kick us out of the camp.  (What is it with my kids?!  Do they hate me?  Lie to me and tell me they are just well adjusted and secure knowing they can be away from mom and survive.)
• With both kids gone for a week, FG and I reverted back to being DINK's.  We enjoyed ourselves.  Actually I think we kept ourselves busy so we didn't think about the fact our kids were all over the place.  One day we worked from 9-5, had a client event at 5:30 which was Family Night to see Cars 2 (we snuck out since we didn't have kids and saw Green Lantern), then we went out to dinner together at a swanky bar downtown and didn't get home until after 10 pm.  I don't think we've done that since we have had kids!  Then we spent a few days in San Francisco before picking up DD on the way home.
• DS came home 2 days before DD's 7th birthday.  He was not happy to come home.  He had a blast but I was more than ready for my kids to be back under my roof!
• DD turned 7. She had a nice party. She got her ears pierced. 
• Now I'm doing the kid-juggle every day for work.  Thankfully one grandma will take them on Mondays.  A friend who's kids play with mine takes them some Tuesdays.  Wednesdays I work with FG so they just come to the studio with us and then Thursday they have been spending the day with my dad.  I'm off Fridays. 
• Last Friday since they had been shuffled around so much all week without much fun - lots of errand running with the grandparents etc - I decided we would have a super fun day.  We went pottery painting, had a picnic lunch, watched a play, made pizza at home then went mini golfing when FG got home from work.  They had the "best day ever!"  I explained to them that is why Mom works and they have to go do not-such-fun things sometimes.  I think they are old enough that they got it.  They seemed to  understand that the things we did took money and mom has to work for money.   Of course the next day they were at each other's throats all day and I punished them by making them pull weeds.
• I'm trying my damndest to get us to eat better and having a bit more income is helping that.  Tomorrow I get my first delivery of organic fruits & veggies - as local as possible.  We are going to get 1/2 a cow this fall.  I'm starting to get local fresh eggs.  For the past year I've been giving us local raw honey for allergies (works ah-maaaaay-zing!).  I'm anxious to try the fruits & veggies.  It was pretty inexpensive actually!  Almost as cheap as what I pay for non-orgainc stuff at the grocery store.  The cow I'm excited about too.  It won't be ready till fall but they are fed the grains from a local brewery and alfalfa.  No steriods, no hormones, no pesticides.  Happy drunk cows! 
• We may be the only people in the country paying off our debt.  As sucky as it is at times, when we look at where our bills started to where they are now, we are proud of ourselves.  Business is improving, FG's new project doesn't hurt either!  We are still fairly broke and still watching every penny but we could have easily said screw it, and walked away from all the bills.  I know it's taught our kids a good lesson and FG and I have survived through I think the worst of it. 
• I'm getting the house cleaned every other week and FG is no longer speaking to his dad's wife.  If you've read any of my posts over the past few years this will all make sense to you.  FIL finally saw first hand that she is a selfish, money-grubbing bitch.  I don't know that I've ever met anyone as selfish.  But now we are done paying for them to get their house cleaned every week and me working essentially 3 jobs (PTA/School stuff can take up as much time as my paying job!) and scrubbing my own house.  I told FG that if the whole thing went away, fine, he could sell that space and we would at least get income for it.  I only want it because it's there and it's dumb that we are giving it away to his dad's bitchy wife every week.  So yay me! 
• 2011 so far is 1000x better than 2010!

Well Hot Damn! It's been awhile!

Let's see... I'll give you a little run down in case you care.....

• I turned 40. gulp.  FG had a great party for me. It was 80's themed and everyone got into the spirit. It was fabulous and over too fast and I didn't drink enough because I was up at 7:30 the next morning cleaning the kitchen.  Now I'm 40.  whoa.
• DS turned 10 (before I turned 40, thank you!).  I got to experience having a bunch of little boys around for 2 days straight.  I gave him a great party - complete with the chocolate fountain, no cake.  I am C-R-A-Z-Y.
• We've had some bumps and bruises at school. Not the literal sort.  Thank God we have an amazing principal and counselor at our school.  The teacher is not worth a whole hell of a lot.  Fourth grade is tough tough tough anyway.  But this teacher has one foot out the door of the school since she's been there 25 years. I was about ready to kick her butt the rest of the way.  We had a big meeting. FG got to play Bad Cop, I got to play Good Cop.  The principal got to play even Badder Cop and the counselor got to play mediator.  We got what we wanted, DS seems happier and all is going much better. 
• I've been kidnapped by the school PTA.  It all started when I volunteered to help out with the first book fair of the year.  Our party-loving librarian decided to have a Girls Night Out as a thank you to everyone who volunteered.  That included teachers, parents and the principal (thus getting to know her better).  Yeah, so that was great and all but becoming friends with a 50 year old librarian with no kids who likes to have parties and do-do-do and go-go-go has not been good for the relaxation part of my life.  Now I'm do-do-doing and go-go-going because she ropes me into stuff.  It's fun though so the social part of my life has been busy. And really, how many people can say they hang out with the school principal and drink wine and gossip?  I've learned SO much from being around these other parents and the more out-going, social teachers who aren't afraid to hang with the parents from the school.  It's helped (see above about the Big Meeting). 
• This has also caused me to volunteer to take on the membership chair for the PTA next year.  Miss Librarian and I did the nominating committee for next year's board.  Now suddenly we are signed up to do all sorts of (fun) stuff and going to the PTA convention.  I told FG they have a PTA store there and maybe I'll come home with a cool fanny pack or tote bag to show the world I'm a PTA member! He called me a Goober.  But really, for membership I have a ploy to fill people's bellies with wine and yummies so they'll volunteer for more stuff. I'm sneaky that way!
• I quit my job at the toystore.  My last day is tomorrow.  I decided that I was done with it all.  I do not like the manager. She is negative.  I mean, we work with toys! It's supposed to be FUN.  She was such a downer every day.  She "hates" everything that comes in and thinks it's all "stupid". She's just not pleasant and honestly, sales are showing!  My boss, the store owner, dragged it out of me yesterday so I finally gave her the full scoop.  I told her that is what prompted me to start looking for another job.  It took a few weeks but I found one that will be challenging and fun at the same time. 
• Now I have to find stuff for my kids to do over Spring Break and in the summer.  My new job, a Marketing position for three businesses under one umbrella, is flexible and it's still part time but I do need to go to the office. I don't want to start and say, "Oh by the way, care if I work from home all summer?"  yeah. not a great way to start off.  She's cool, she's flexible but she's still running a business.
• Today I am sorting and tagging a gazillion things for a large consignment sale coming up.  It's all kids stuff and it seems like DD suddenly got too old for so many of the toys & games we have.  So shortly after Christmas I ruthlessly cleaned things out.  Now I'm going to consign as much as I can and what doesn't sell will get donated to charity.  I drop it all off on the 24th and will never see it again! Then I just have to sit and wait for my check.  I'm really hoping I get a decent amount so I can go buy the little girl some new clothes.  She is a weed, I tell ya!  She's sooooo tall!!! 6 years old and needs a size 8, at least.  Some of her shirts I have been getting in a 10! 
• DS has been playing basketball. He's a little guy. Doesn't play very well but dang he loves it and gives it his all!  For a kid who doesn't like people too close to him, he is right in the middle of the game.  It's awesome to watch!  He's totally bummed that the season is ending. :(
• One amazing thing the principal did for my little sensory kid is she got him a sensory cushion!  This boy has not sat down in a chair in class in 4 years.  Now, he sits.  He says he likes the bumps on it.  AHHHH-MAZING!
• Other than all of that, I am still plugging away with my coupons and bargain shopping.  I've done really well lately and it's been necessary.  I've even dragged FG with me and he gets into it too. :)  We are still no where close to the "extreme couponers" but I have saved our family a decent amount of money!

Goodbye Bubba

FG's cat died today.  His mother is a mess.  Bubba lived with her.  There was some shared custody after FG's parents divorced but for the most part, Bubba was the companion of my MIL.  He was a cranky old cat, with good reason.  FG got the cat in 1991 a few months before we met in 1992.   Thus, we stared calling him "Yoda" because he was so freakin' old.  He used up all of his 9 lives in the first few years - he was 1) attacked by a dog and nearly killed - he had a notch out of his ear as his battle scar
2) Shot.  That shattered his leg and it was rebuilt.  He had a funky external cast thing on for awhile that looked like a handle sticking off his leg.  I think that was on there when FG and I got married.
3) right after he got his "handle" off, he jumped and broke the same leg.  Literally days later.  He had more surgery and got some metal put in there.
4) he developed kitty diabetes and had to have shots of insulin daily

I think there's a few things I'm missing because it seemed like that cat kept the Vet in a Mercedes. 
He was obnoxious when he was younger too.  He sat and tried to take food off my fork when I would eat dinner.  Why he bothered me I have no idea.  But always me.  He would swipe at my hand while I ate.  He also "felt me up" regularly.  FG would pick him up and hold him like a baby. He would reach out one paw and always put it on my boob.  When we were first dating and FG was still living at home, I would spend the night even though I wasn't supposed to.  We managed to keep it a secret in his little twin bed and MIL would come in and put the cat on FG every morning.  As we hid under the covers trying to look like one person, she plopped the cat on us.  We finally told her a few years ago and she swears she had no idea.  (Yes, she really is that clueless sometimes).

The funniest thing about him is the past few years he had a "gang" of old men cats.  I have never ever seen a cat go to another cat's front door and meow until the other cat was let out.  Bubba had two friends who did this regularly.  They came to his door and waited until MIL let him out and then off they would go - grumpy old men.  I think they swapped kitty war stories...."Then the dog, enormous with giant sharp teeth, had me in his clenched jaw...." 

MIL will be very sad for awhile. It's hard to have a cat that long and not miss him.  FG will miss him too.   My kids will really miss him too.  DS does not do well with the animal's deaths.  So I lied. This morning before school I told him that Bubba was sick but still alive.  At that very moment, he was but the vet was on her way over to change that and I knew it.

While I'm at it - pictures!

A little glimpse of our summer....

Sunset on Donner Lake, July 4, 2010

How we watch fireworks every year - over Donner Lake

6th Birthday Family Party July, 2010

Her present from her brother.  SO excited!

She wanted the same cake as last year.  I think it turned out great!  (Yes, I made it)

Danish roll lesson with my Grandma

DS took a nice picture of us!

The true test... Dad said they were perfect! He hasn't had them in years and my mom could never get them right.  DD sure loved them too!

The Cast

DD doing her solo part during "So Long, Farewell" ("I leave and heave a sigh and say Goodbye. GOOOOODDDDDD BYYYYYYEEEEEEEEE")  Aug 1, 2010

Swimming with her BFF.  My dad put the big fountain in for the girls and they had a blast!

Giving myself the day

Well the kids too.  I planned to take them to the beach today but decided not to.  I am not sure if DD's BFF and her brother are coming over here this afternoon or not.  Their parents, while extremely nice and great people, are a tad, um, unorganized and flaky.  While I am an overachiving planner and I know I drive my friends bat-$!@# crazy with it, they are somewhat the opposite.  A planner?  A calendar?  eh! Who needs 'em!  Yes, the thought makes my skin all tingly and I get light-headed as mine is rarely a few feet from me and certainly never left at home when I am out and about.  God bless whoever invented the electronic organizer. 

But because I decided to give myself the day and I have a list a mile long of things I would like to accomplish, I am not doing anything!  I stayed in bed until an embarassing hour.  The kids were up and watching TV (no need for mom anymore, they can both work the darn thing perfectly).  I finally rolled out of bed and showered.  I finally made them brunch. Do I know what's for dinner?  Nope. That's on my list of things I want to get done today - read through some recipes and possibly try something new!  DS has requested hot dogs or steak.  Kids are weird.

I just realized it's nearly noon.  Holy crap. I have nothing done besides feeding my kids one meal. At least I cooked it for them and it was a large meal so I doubt they will really want any lunch soon.  It's a gorgeous day outside too.  We should be out enjoying it! 

Am I the only one who does this?  It seems like so many people I know get so many things accomplished. I guess they don't laze around in bed all morning.  I'm feeling guilty yet free all in one big ball of confusion.  I feel like I'm wasting time but still enjoying slowing down a bit.  So what is wrong with me?  I'm going to be kicking myself later when I think of all I need to get done and just piddled the time away.  I know I'm going to feel guilty, scratch that because I already do, that my kids are watching TV instead of playing a game with them or taking them somewhere fun and interesting with friends.  Why can't I just feel normal and happy?!  I really do think I'm losing my mind some days. Stress is killing off brain cells way faster than any amounts of alcohol. 

Now, off to make a couple of phone calls, write out a list so I can cross things off and hopefully get my rear in gear!  What are you doing today?

Dare I really say it?

I am getting into the groove of thinking about school starting and I'm really not minding it all that much.  Whew. That was a round about way of saying I'm looking forward to school starting.  Ok, well, I am and I am not.  It's going to be so tough to have both of my babies gone ALL. DAY. LONG. and it's going to be tough to deal with two sets of nightly homework, spelling test lists, science fair projects, read-a-thon times..... you get the idea.  But FG and I have both noticed that the days are getting a bit shorter and the nights are getting a bit cooler. But I am really in need of a break from these two!  I can barely think straight (ha, no comments please, I am fully aware I have Mommy Brain!).

This post was just interrupted by me telling my 9 1/2 year old son that he sounds like an idiot and kids will make fun of him for acting the way he was at that moment.  I told him I didn't mean to hurt his feelings but he will get made fun of by other kids and that probably will hurt his feelings a lot more if he keeps up acting like a complete fool.  He screeches like a girl and he makes these noises that sound like a strangled cat.  It grates on my every last nerve.

Where was I?.... oh yes, Mommy Brain.  My patience is running very thin from all the running we've been doing.  Our diet isn't great these days.  The fruit basket is E.M.P.T.Y., the carbs and overall crap foods are up.  Maybe that's the explanation for the idiotic behavior?  This week was supposed to be a bit slower but alas, no such luck.  Monday my mom was off work so I took the kids to swim. I normally do laundry and clean up the house on Mondays.  I've been piece-mealing the laundry all week and that is just not my style!  I do it all at once and get that shit folded and put away that very same day.  It's all in baskets in my bedroom right now - unfolded and wrinkling. I've been piece-mealing the housecleaning too.  Ok, that really doesn't work!  Then I get no respite!  I'm doing a "big" job every day and usually it's at some God-awful time like 10:30 at night.  It feels like once I get one bathroom cleaned and a floor mopped, it's time to do it all over again. 
Yesterday was only Tuesday but it was a work day for me both at the toystore and in the office.  So I rushed DS out to golf then rushed DD and I to the office to get some paperwork done for 2 hours then rushed out to get DS then rushed home to throw some food in all of us (at 3:30. Yep, that's when my kids finally ate some lunch which was a lovely balanced meal of chocolate milk and pizza rolls.  That was after DD had a cereal bar & a sucker around 12:30).  Then I rushed off to work at the toystore and no frickin wonder I didn't feel like doing anything when I got home.  I didn't have any patience when I tried to get the kids to bed either.  Yes! I'll start clearning room for my Mom of the Year Award.  So along with our wonderful diet, my psyche is not in a good spot.

4 weeks.  That's when school will start.  Things will really change around here and change with an SPD kid is always a big struggle.  That's another post rattling around in my head - the vast differences between a "normal" kid and mine.  I've got one of each and boy howdy does it keep me on my toes! 
Any advice out there to make the transition easier, please please pass it along.  We all suffer every school year getting the routine going.  Try as I may to start it early with earlier bedtimes and a more rigid schedule, I struggle with trying to make the most of the last precious lazy days of summer. 

I feel like I haven't read a blog all summer, like all I've done on mine is b&m about how busy we've been and how crazy it makes me.  I haven't baked or tried new recipes. Heck, I've barely cooked much!  I miss my bloggy friends and I know I'm here talking to myself because of it.  I'm headed to a new era and I'm scared.  On top of that, I think I'm going to work days at the store instead of nights.  I'm waiting to see what will happen but they are opening a new location in town (Liz, up by you!!!).  I talked to my boss and told her that I would ideally like to work a few days while the kids are in school. This works out for her too because the college girls go back to class soon too, making them unavailable during the day.  I may still work every other Saturday day because that is actually fun for me.  I see the kids and the parents from school and get to retain my "Rock Star" status among the elementary school age kids.  I wrap a heck of a lot of presents and don't do a lot of store cleaning.  So we'll see how this whole transition works out for this family of 4.  Until then, I'm trying to figure out how to get a break but still enjoy the last few weeks of summer with my idiotic wonderful little children!

Present but not present....

These are the things keeping me away from the computer..... I'm not present online but I'm present with my family!

1. I think the schools/teachers pack in a ton of stuff at the end of the year so we all really really appreciate summer!
2. Kindergarten Graduation (FG has the pics and hasn't given them to me yet :(  They are so dang cute!!!) and having a "Donut Date" with her teacher and a couple of friends after the ceremony.  I really think I made two new friends this year in both of my kids' teachers. 
3. DS's end of the year "Teach the Class a Lesson".  How cool is that for a 3rd grader to do?  Each kid had to prepare a lesson plan and teach the class something.  DS taught Paper Airplanes and DD and I stayed in class to watch him.  It was great.  They addressed him as "Mr. ____" and they raised their hands to ask questions.  So cool.  His teacher sat with me on the last day of school for quite awhile and gave me her phone numbers to call her over the summer.  I told her how much I enjoyed being in her classroom too and could talk to her for hours!  She said she would love to get together socially over the summer.  That makes DS happy because he ADORED her.  See below. I'm still a bit freaked out to now have a 4th & 1st grader!

This is DS's picture.  He dumped out a bucket of golf balls we have and he said, "Mom! It'a a miracle! It looks like the United States minus Hawaii & Alaska!"  So he took a pic. 

4. Endless Princess Dress up! 

5.  Good times with good friends.  DD and some of her classmates (Told you she is very tall!).  Her BFF is the one with the blue shirt on the far right.  Yes, her teacher really did rent a cotton candy machine and sugar up those kids on the last day of school!  I painted faces and the kids deemed me good enough at it to "go work at a circus or a carnival or somewhere cool like that!"  This pic was obviously pre-face paint.  I am hoping BFF's mom will email me the facepainting pics soon.

6. Playdates Playdates Playdates!  We jumped right in with one the last day of school.  My sweet friend had me bring over my kids to her house instead of them getting schlepped off to FG's office so I could go to work.  The next day DD's BFF and her brother, DS's 2nd BFF, came over for an entire day-long playdate.  Mostly that was to give their mom a break getting ready for their vacation.  We all know it's tough enough to pack and finish last-minute stuff without two kiddos around!  So I kept them here for the day and we made sugar cookies (I had sugar all over my kitchen) and played lots of wii and dress up.  We've had something going on every single day since school got out. Today is the first day it's been quiet and I'm catching up online, with laundry & cleaning my bedroom carpets.  I think I'd rather have another playdate!

This is the result of all the going going going we've been doing.  Poor DD put on too-warm jammies and was so darn tired, she couldn't manage to do much else but pass out flat!

7.  FG and I also celebrated our 16th wedding anniversary.

8. We took the boat out for the first time of the season.  It ran well and we had a great day!

I am really looking forward to the rest of summer.  We're having an Oscar Mayer Hot Dog House Party next weekend.  That will be fun!  We've got lots of other get-together's with friends coming up too.  The kids are both participating in the community theater acting group that DS did last summer and they have rehearsal 2x per week until performances mid-July through beginning of August.  My Grandma is coming to visit too!

Yay Summer!!!!

Absence

Sorry about that, all 3 readers of mine! (Dooce gets a TV show, Pioneer Woman gets a movie -WTF?).

Things have been a bit topsy-turvy here.  Not just our weather, which today we woke up to snow. Yes, MF'ing snow (sorry, I'm done being nice about it) and it's predicted to be 80 by this Sunday. 

No, last week my dad was back in the hospital.  It wasn't good and it hasn't been good since. I just got off the phone with him and he's still really bad off.  He's been throwing up since he got home. He feels simply awful.  He went into the hospital for more heart and breathing trouble.  My parents actually called an ambulance.  That means it's really bad.  When two nurses call an ambulance, you know it's serious.  Anyway, it's been tough.  I've been doing what I can but there's really not much I can do.  I made FG drive us all out to their house on Sat. afternoon after I got off work and mow their lawn.  The LAST thing I needed my dad doing was stressing over the long grass.  FG grumbled, I told him to get over it and be a decent humand being. 

Then there has been a ton of stuff at school.  First, it was Teacher Appreciation Week.  I worked on a really awesome project with another mom for DS's 3rd grade teacher.   She loved it and that makes me happy. 
Then there were two unnerving phone calls from the school.  Last week, I got a call about 20 minutes after school was supposed to begin.  From The Principal.  That is just never a good thing. They don't call you to say, "Your son is just awesome."  No, they call when there's a problem.  Oh, the week before it was the nurse who called to tell me that she took my son's temp and it was normal.  Uh, OK.  Then she wanted to send him home because he informed her his "salivary glands hurt" and he had told her his eyes were crusty when he woke up that morning.  I told her that I sent in a note letting the teacher know that his seasonal allergies were acting up and they have a tendency to settle in his eye when he sleeps.  Thankfully, the nurse did not make me bring him home.  Back to the call from The Principal.  She knows me. Heck I'm at school enough she knows me by name.  The reason for the call was that the bus got in an accident on the way to school that morning and some children were being checked out for neck pain.  She let me talk to my son who was not injured.  Actually, none of the kids really were hurt at all, they were just being super-cautious.  DS told me how cool it was when the car hit the bus.  Typical boy.  He was fine.

Yesterday morning I got up late and decided to shower after DS got on the bus.  Dumb Mommy Move of the day was to send DS on the bus in the first place with his diorama for class.  But dammit, I didn't get much a rest on Mother's Day, that extra 1/2 hour of sleep was great, especially on a cold Monday morning.  So my selfishness was rewarded with a frantic phone call from DS's teacher 15 min after school began.  (But now I have her cell phone number - woo!) His diorama fell apart on the way to school and he was in a tizzy.  The sensory part of the kid could NOT calm down over it.  "Could you please come down and help him fix it?"  was her plea and then his plea.  So after a super fast shower and got DD ready, I was at the school about 40 min later, hot glue gun in hand.  I went into disaster relief mode and became the Red Cross for Dioramas.  I got it all fixed up and then stayed to listen to his presentation.  He got an A+, whew!  After looking (and yes, admittedly comparing) at the other kids' dioramas, I was super-proud of my son. 

I've also been absent from the computer for a few other reasons. 1) the one I'm using sort of limps along. I dont' like it and miss having one that works well.  2) I'm trying very hard to focus on real-life relationships.  Not that cyber friends aren't exremely important to me!  I'm just doing a lot of in-person interacting.  I'm trying to use the phone as opposed to email so much.  I'm trying to have more playdates and social dates with friends.  I've lamented before on how I miss being social and having close friends at times and I've also shared my pet peeve of not attempting to change things that bother a person.  So I am trying to remedy that part and so far it's working well.  But there are only so many hours in a day, which means the computer time gets cut.

Also, I haven't made ANY new recipes lately!  I need to, as DD told me the other day (made up from her head), "get off the spatula and get cookin' again!"

Great book on less toxic living!

I checked out this book from the library weeks ago.  I stuck it on a shelf when people were coming over and didn't pull it back out until I realized it was due back.  Then I started thumbing through it.  I renewed it.

Better Basics for the Home by Annie Berthold-Bond.  Simple solutions for less toxic living.  It is full of recipes for various household formulas.  I plan on mixing up a batch of weed killer this weekend!  Salt, vinegar and liquid detergent.  I just have to go get some better liquid detergent.  FG and I have a huge battle of the weeds. They are out of control in our rocks.  Literally.  He will whack them down and then BURN them.  Uh, we live in the DESERT.  Burning is not a good idea!  He does it regularly and I'm just waiting for him to get in trouble.  It's such a big no-no!!!  Thankfully he's always got the hose right there but still. Dude. It just seems stupid to me!  Anyway, he doesn't like to use harsh chemicals on the weeds.  I know we could literally erradicate them in an instant but our animals and our kids play in our yard.  Do I really want that crap on their bare feet or their hands when they are exploring?  So we just live with a jungle of awful weeds.  We pull, we do use some weed killer on areas that they don't play, he burns.  Yet they seem to be always present.  I'm hoping this formula, used on the rocks will help.  Even if we do have to do it every few weeks, it's non-toxic so I don't mind. 

There's recipes for just about any & every household product in this book.  Right down to shampoo and homemade hair dye.  I plan to copy many of them and eventually buy the book.  I will draw the line at using whipped egg whites as a hair mousse though. 

I have been happily using baking soda and vinegar for a few years to clean.  Yes, I do still use the occasional Comet but most of the time, it's baking soda and vinegar.  It works well and it's super duper cheap!  I also told FG that I am switching from OxyClean to Borax after this box is gone.  I do love the way OxyClean gets out stains so well though!  Does anyone know how awful it is for the environment? I know it's derived from hydrogen peroxide but don't know how bad that or any of it's other ingredients are. 

So check out the book if you are looking for some alternatives.  I need to hit up our health food store for some items to make a salve for DS's eczema spots.  The Dr. gave us an oil that worked well and it was mostly made of peanut oil (thankfully, no allegies here!).  I'm hoping I can use the recipe in this book and make it with peanut oil and give him some relief!

Some random Friday thoughts

• FG went skiing today.  Bastard.  If he breaks his dumb thumb again I'm going to just cut the damn thing off with my kitchen shears.  He's had his cast off less than a week! His arguement:  "I didn't break it actually skiing. I broke it because some idiot ran into me and I fell on it."  He's just pissed because he can't golf yet and it was warm out and he had to stay inside actually WORKING all day.  That isn't the norm for him on nice sunny days.
• It's Friday and I'm itchy for social plans.  I hate it when we don't have any plans for fun stuff for an entire weekend.
• Spring Break starts as of 3:00 this afternoon.  I think we are the only family I know NOT leaving town.
• I am working a bunch of extra days next week.  Whoohoo for the paycheck. ewww for shuffling my kids around all over the place and not doing anything fun.
• Next weekend is FG's birthday.  My parents, bless them, are taking the kids for the whole weekend.  I think MIL is going to take them during the day on Friday and my mom will get them from her after she gets off work. 
• FG and I are going away for ONE night.  We're headed to a home design center in a nearby larger city to look for a new entry way light.
• My friend who Feng Shui's houses was here and told me we need a new entry way light.  DUH!  FG and I have known that for years. We hate it!  We have always said we want one that is lower and has the lights aimed down instead of up.  She told me that is exactly correct.  It's our "career path" and it needs downward lighting.  Whatever the case, we hate the light and hey, it can't really hurt right now to have a little goodness headed to the career path!
• We are also going to a couple of our favorite wineries in N. CA.  ahhhhh!!!!!!!
• Sat. for his actual b-day we are headed to a friend's local brew pub.  It's housed in the same building where FG and I had our very first date.  I invited a ton of people but about 4 can come because WE ARE THE ONLY ONES NOT LEAVING FOR SPRING BREAK!
• FG and I had the discussion/disagreement the other night about watching friend's marriages fall apart.  I think it makes us work harder and appreciate our marriage more.  He thoguht it didn't have anything to do with us.  I think that by listening to his friend woe about his ending marriage should make FG appreciate that I am not a bitch like his friend's wife!  She's the one who used sex to get what she wanted, is very materialistic, cheated on her husband and thought she was pg (hubby got fixed, needless to say, he wasn't happy when he found the pg test!), dragged them to therapy and claimed she wanted to work on things while they lived separately, decided to try "date nights" and when it was going a bit too well the hubby found out that she had been texting her lover the whole time they were out together.  Really FG? That doesn't make you a teeny bit appreciative that I take care of you/kids/our home,  flirt with YOU via text message, am scraping and sacrificing and dealing with getting us out of debt, try to make our lives fun and happy and minimally complain?  Really? 
• A guy in the office is trying to get me to watch Food Inc.  When our financial situation improves I might. Until then, ignorance is bliss (and affordable).
• DS's class has been studying nutrition.  I'm quite sure his teacher has watched Food Inc.  He now busts us on every thing in the house that is less than stellar.  ha! This is from the kid who gags on any and all vegetables and fruits with the exception of about 2.  If it will get him to eat better, I'm all for it!  It's not like I want them to not eat well!!  I buy the good stuff, they generally refuse it.  ugh. Maybe now the correlation will sink in.  DS actually asked for lettuce on his buger last night (home made - no McDonald's.  Low fat ground beef.  yes, I do cook 95% of our meals from scratch).
• BOTH of my kid's teachers are amazing.  2 weeks ago today I had a breakdown at school.  I was frustrated and it all just came out.  DS's teacher held me like a mother with a child.  I am still embarassed but she was so kind.  Then DD's teacher brought me a gorgeous calla lily plant to the toystore the next day (Sat.) while I was working.  She said she just wanted to brighten my day.  What wonderful human beings I have entrusted my children to!  Both so kind and truly caring not about their paycheck and getting through the day, but the family behind those children they teach.  I'm still touched and amazed.
• One final note... what the heck is up with all these old women piercing their noses?!  I've seen more older women with these shiny dots on the sides of their noses lately.  WTF?  Now I'm nearly, gulp, 40, and I wouldn't do it.  I am talking about women in their mid 50's & 60's.  Nope. I don't get it at all.

It's the little things....

It is the little things that make me feel like I'm doing an ok job at this Mom gig. 
A big thing happened the other night too.  Poor DS just had a meltdown. I think quite a few things just built up and he let it all out at once.  He so very rarely cries and he cried on me.  We talked and talked it out.  I got FG involved.  DS said a pretty serious thing that made my heart break into a million pieces. It wasn't about me or FG or anyone else but it showed the depth of how upset he was.  At one point during our talk FG said, "Buddy, you are only in 3rd grade.  It can't be that bad."  I reminded FG that while we tend to think of DS as a mini-adult, he isn't.  This is what he's living.  He doesn't know anything past 3rd grade and being 9 so yeah, this is as bad as it gets to him.  FG wasn't trying to blow it off at all, he was struggling just like me with the right things to say to comfort DS.  All seems to be ok now.  I let him know that we are behind him, here to talk to and protect him always.  I'm going to have him go in and talk to the school counselor because he seems to like that.  I sense therapy in his adult life, he really feels better after that. 

Anyway, the little things yesterday were....
I picked the kids up from school. I rarely do that unless I'm already at school.  I don't often leave the house to go sit in the parking lot because it's so small I have to get there early to get any sort of decent parking spot.  (Hello run on sentence).  The bus lets the kids off on the side of the house and they don't ride it long.  I just don't see a big point in going to get them every day.  But they like it, it was nasty weather yesterday and I wanted to see them. I've started working on Tuesday nights as well as Wednesday nights so I knew I wouldn't really get to see them much.  It took some of my "me" time away but it was worth it.

Earlier in the day I had picked up some library books for all of us.  DD knew one was coming - she had been waiting for it since we reserved it.  Instead of just putting them on their beds to find I decided a scavenger hunt would be fun.  So I made up 7 clues and hid them in various places.  Not too long ago, DS made a mailbox and we hung it outside of his bedroom.  We pass little notes back & forth in it (he raises the red flag when he has "outgoing mail" for me or FG to read).  I put the instructions and the first clue in there.  They had a blast!  They only spent about 10 minutes or so reading, solving and hunting down the clues.  They finally found their library books hidden in the dryer with a "Good Job!" note. 
They both thanked me about 20 times for that silly little scavenger hunt.  It was the last thing they both said when they went to bed too.  After I left for work, DS made up one for FG and DD to follow.  So it continued on well into the evening.

Then I made the night of a child shopping in the toystore last night.  Just another little thing but he spent his allowance money on something small while his sister made up her birthday registry.  They were in the store for quite awhile.  All of a sudden he came up to me at the counter and exclaimed, "I lost my tooth!" and proudly held up his tooth and showed me the hole.  Now when someone comes in with a cast on, they get a desginated present.  So I felt we just HAD to do something for this little boy.  We have these little tooth fairy boxes and I asked him if the tooth fairy comes to his house. He said yes. I asked him if he has a little box and he said no.  So I led him over to the display and told him to pick one out.  With big round eyes, he said, "Do I have to pay?"  I told him nope, I was going to give it to him.  He was thrilled.  His father had stepped out of the store to make a phone call and I told him to make sure he told his dad I let him take it for losing his tooth in the store.  I later overheard him tell his dad, "She's a really nice lady, isn't she dad?"

Now I'm about to go do another small thing for a store customer.  She called for the second day in a row asking about instructions for a kit that were not in the box.  Her daughter wants to make the kit for a school project.  I just happen to have the same kit at home.  When she left her name, phone and email asking that the store owners Please call her soon, I told her I would just email the instructions to her today.  She was SO thankful.  So I'm going to scan the 3 pages of instructions and email them to her.  It will probably take me 10 minutes.

All of these little things have made me feel pretty good and hopefully made others feel good. I know my kids were happy with me, I know the little boy will probably remember losing that tooth over some of the other ones and hopefully this mom will help her daughter who will in turn get a good grade on her project. 

Will you do something little to make someone's day today?

Hospitals, injuries, chaos, OH MY!

Well, no menu plan for me for the past few weeks.  I've been 1) flying by the seat of my pants 2) not grocery shopping so we've been eating up everything in the house.  Seriously people, it's getting bad! :) 

Last weekend my dad was sick.  We thought it was pneumonia but we couldn't get him to go to the hospital. Finally last Monday my mom was able to talk him into going to the Dr. and they admitted him to the hospital.  He had bronchitis.  But his breathing is compromised already since he needs to be on oxygen all the time.  While in the hospital he had a heart attack. A silent one that he didn't even know about.  But the nurses sure did!  That led to a couple of procedures to check his grafts from 8 years ago when he had triple bypass.  He spent the week in the hospital and it was not fun.  We worried, we prayed, we visited, the kids looked out the window and were scared and fascinated by all the wires & tubes he had.  DS wanted to go see all the parts of the hospital and would have kept watching the happenings and heart monitors at the nurse's station the whole time if he could.  He wanted to go see pulmonology and the ER.  He wanted to go watch a surgery. If that kid isn't cut out to be a doctor I don't know who is.  We'll just have to wait and see what he ends up being.   Dad ended up going home after a second heart cath on Friday.  He's feeling much much better now too.

Also last Monday a contractor came and ripped out my guest bath and entry from the garage.  The next day our friend who is a tile installer laid some sub-floor stuff for under the tile.  The tile is on order.  Our friend is going out of town and won't be able to do the floor until next week.  In my garage is the toilet, the baseboards, the old mirror that I wanted the contractor to take away and boxes of the new stuff.  It's a tad chaotic out there and a tad chaotic in the house too.  There's a tarp on the floor at the entry from the garage.  It's also where the door to the laundry room is.  My house also smells like "contruction".  Fun times!  I'll post before & after pics when it's eventually done.

Yesterday FG came home from skiing holding his arm funny.  Turns out some idiot not looking cut him off coming out of the trees and not looking.  This made FG crash, his friend crash and FG broke his thumb.  Off to the ER we went after I got my FIL to come hang with the kids.  The last thing I wanted was to drag the kids off to the ER for a few hours - as fascinating as that would have been for DS!  So FG, being a man, is now nearly helpless because he has a broken thumb.  I will give him the credit that is is difficult to do many things when you don't have the use of one hand and he IS in pain.  Thankfully it's on his left hand and he is right handed.  I've had my right hand (also a righty) immobilzed and it's not easy to function.  Yeah, you go around and try to do everything with your opposite hand.  Just try it out in the bathroom girls, it is no picnic.  He needs to see an orthopedist in the next few days and see what we need to do from there.  It's apparently an injury/break that is very easy to re-injure if it's not fixed correctly.  Yay! More bills!

DS has a biography report due at the end of this week.  It consists of a written report, an oral report and props - either costume, item or a poster.  Yay! LOVE 3rd grade and having the hardest teacher in the school!  Actually it's good for him, he just gets overwhelmed and not sure where to start and his spelling is awful.  So he needs a lot of guidance on these things.  I won't do it for him but I will help him and guide him.  I guess I did sign up for this parent gig huh?

Wish me luck ladies.  I think I'm gonna need it.  I'm actually quite surprised I have held up as well as I have this past week.  It's been very very stressfull.  I only broke down once in sobs.

What does life have in store for me?

I'm itchy and anxious.  I have that "I want to do SOMETHING" feeling.  Maybe it's Party-Let-Down?  I have all these grand ideas swirling in my head and can't seem to pull one coherent thing toghether.  I feel like I'm waiting on something.  Part of it is the season.  Give a girl a dose of nice weather after some very long dreary days and it will mess with her head.  We've had such nice weather it gives me spring fever. It's not the spring fever that makes me want to throw open the windows and deep clean though.  I think I got enough of that lately.  I am not a gardener at all. I like to look at things but I literally suck at growing things.  I have several houseplants that I've had since we got married over 15 years ago but they are the hearty variety that are damn near impossible to kill as long as you water them. 

No, I am all jazzed up about helping us build our business.  I want to figure something out. FG isn't on the same page.  Sure he wants to build up the business but yeah, he's had a really rough week on top of not feeling well (the man does not do sick at all).  Having me harp on him about doing more is probably the last thing on earth he's enjoying this week.  Since the ideas are just swirling and I don't even have any true idea what I want to do or how I want to do it I think I'll just have to let them stew for awhile.

I'm also high on the social aspect of life yet down on the fact that we have so many aquaintences.  I miss the high school days of BFF's.  We have lots of friends but we don't have those super-duper close friends that call us and we call them automatically.  Does anyone else feel this way or am I being adolescent?  Do I need to grow up and figure out that my family is what I've got and that's where it ends?  Or do you have those super-duper close friends and I'm the envious outcast in this picture?

While I read blogs in between researching what I can do to get to a better place with both of these issues, I'll continue to plod along with working at the toystore and feeling like my brain is shrinking daily.  What happened to me?  Was I fooling myself thinking I was intelligent when all along I was just mediocre?    I feel like maybe if I took a class of some sort, got more education I would feel like I am doing something.  Actually, I think I just need to do something.

"One step must start each journey."

Party recap & bullet-y life

• The party was a success!  You can see me with all my hard work displayed.  The only thing I noticed is we got all of our friends together and they all stayed in their own comfort groups.  That was kind of a bummer.
• FG decided to be a bartender.  It started out with wanting to make chocolate martinis and progressed to having a full on bar w/ a menu.  We had a bunch of open bottles of odd stuff already.  It turned out great and the drinks were yuummmmmmy!
• I sort of felt snubbed by the wives of the guys in FG's office.  I had never met them. They both work full time jobs and they are both very into fitness.  I guess we just don't have a lot in common. But they barely talked to me to even find out if there was anything else we could have in common.  FG told me not to worry about it but I can't shake the feeling.  Maybe we'll try again on a smaller scale.  Maybe not.
• We are finally having beautiful weather.  It happens here every February.  I love it!
• I hung clothes on the clothesline yesterday.  I love how fast laundry gets done when I am able to do that. I got all of the week's laundry finished (that includes folding and putting away when I say finished).
• My kids played outside most of the day - without coats, hats, mittens, snow boots etc.
• We made bubble gum yesterday too.  DS got a kit last year for his b-day. We made it once before and I decided that I haven't done much fun stuff with them because of prepping for the party.  So we made two kinds - blueberry and watermelon.  It's fun & yummy tasting!
• I'm headed to work today and my MIL should be here any minute to hang out with DD until she goes to school. 
• I had better get off this computer and get my lunch and DD's lunch ready.  MIL has kitchen issues.
• She watched the kids for 2 hours last week when FG and I had an overlap of not being home.  Ugh.  That can be a separate "bitch session" post!

Random stuff on my mind

• 
  
  It snowed last night and I thought for sure we would have a delay for school. Nope.  I was awake at 6 waiting for the phone to ring for nothing.  Then I fell back to sleep just before the alarm went off at 6:40.  Perfect timing.  Thus, I can't stop yawning today.
  
  
  
• 
  
  I have had zero motivation to clean lately.  I'm doing the basics but I just looked up and saw a spider web from one of the light fixtures, dust bunnies in a corner, dusty blinds, icky fan blades on the kids' ceiling fans.  I just haven't had any motivation to dig in and clean deep.  Don't even ask or look at my baseboards!  We are supposed to have our Sweets Party next month and I just hope that candlelight hides the grit. I can't see getting motivated or getting the time to clean it.
  
  
  
• 
  
  From what I gather, there will be so many people here for the party that no one will be able to look closely at my dusty blinds.  Moving it away from the busy holiday season sure did free up a lot of everyone's time.  YIKES!
  
  
  

• 
  
  FG wants to clone our cat.  She is seriously the most amazing cat with the kids.  Any cat that lets a few day old baby take a nap on her is definitely something special.  She adores the kids and they can dress her up and do just about anything to her. She will nip at them when she's had enough but I've walked in to see her with Mr. Potato Head glasses on, doll clothes, hats, booties on her feet, necklaces - you name it - and that cat just lays there looking at the kids.
  
  
  

• 
  
  We want to take the kids back to San Francisco this summer.  I wish we could go now so I could get some decent ideas for the Science Fair from The Exploratorium.  DS needs to do his project.  Ugh. I don't like the science fair!
  
  
  

• 
  
  It's cold.  I am ready for summer again!  It's only freaking January. 
  
  
  

• 
  
  Why is this picture in our file?  What the heck?  It looks like one of the kids took it because I obviously didn't - those are my feet and my arms may be long but not long enough to get a picture from that angle.  I hope you are not blinded by the lack of tan.  I do not tan well.
  
  
  

• 
  
  How did he get to be NINE and why does he look scared of his cake?  DD looks excited but the boys, eh.  BTW, the goofball on the left is DS's BFF.  Nerds Unite!
  
  
  
• 
  
  Tomorrow I will 39 years old.  I asked DD and she guessed I was 32.  I'll take it.  We're sclepping the kids off to MIL for the night and meeting up with friends for a nice dinner out.  I already got my presents from FG and my parents.  Age has caused me to completely forget one of my presents from my parents. I am not kidding.  I am going to have to ask the kids or FG what it was.  I know one of them was the big cupcake cake pan from Wilton because DD was ecstatic.  But I know I opened two bags and can only remember one.  My memory sucks!  My present from FG was a heated mattress pad.  Ohhhhhhhhh mama I love it!  FG likes it too.  He's actually been resisting it for a few years and to finally convince him I told him I would be more willing to get naked more often if I could get into a snuggly warm bed.  Three days later, it was on my doorstep and on my bed that night.  I LUV it!  But really, how sad is it that for my 39th birthday I get a bed warmer?
  
  
  

Obsessed

I'm trying NOT to be, really, I am but I cannot get it out of my head! 

We are hoping for a trip back to WDW this fall.  This time, my parents want to come and my MIL and possibly  her SO (because it feels weird calling him a "boyfriend" when they are in their 60's).  The BEST family trip we have ever taken was our first trip in 2006. 

It was for DS's 5th birthday and DD was 18 mo. old.  I was turning 35 too.  To use the cliche, it was magical!  The last trip we took was last year around this time.  Maybe that's why I'm obsessing over it now - last year I was getting ready to go and busy planning and mapping things out.  We had crappy weather that put a damper on our trip.  I tried to make the best of it because I kept telling myself there's no way to be unhappy in The Happiest Place On Earth.  We did have a good time, it just didn't measure up to the first experience. 

If we go again and the grandparents go with us it will be a very different trip.  First, none of them have ever gone.  Second, my dad is disabled and will have his scooter to get around. There is NO way he could walk even a small portion of the park. Third, we will just have more people to worry about with different needs/wants and schedules.  Fourth, I have to get my dad to understand that it's ok if we don't all stay in the same place.  We'll stay on property because that's how it the least stressful for me.  If I'm going to go and experience it again when my kids are so young, then I'm going to enjoy every last bit of it!

The hotel part is a problem just getting them all to understand how it works.  My dad, being disabled, can stay at the military resort on property.  It's one of his benefits from the government and putting in his time in Vietnam.  That is the reason he's disabled now so he may as well take advantage of all he's given up to get those benefits - like breathing and walking.  However, he cannot seem to understand that FG and I are NOT comfortable staying at a military resort when we didn't earn those benefits.  He says he earned them for us but he doesn't get FG's utter uncomfortableness taking a room in a hotel like that when he gets to come home to his family every night.  He isn't being shot at, fear being blown up or only gets to see his children via email pictures.  He's young enough that we are the same age as many of the soldiers and families staying at those resorts.  We do not deserve it, THEY do.  My dad surely does as well but we'll suffer having to pay a bit more money because we didn't earn that benefit ourselves.  Sooo, over the next 10 months or so, I need to get my dad to finally understand how Disney works and that it's really OK if we aren't all bunking next door to each other. That's the beauty of DW that is hard to explain if you haven't experienced it.

We have other hurdles to get past to even think about this trip as well.  We still aren't fluid in money.  While we are working hard to change that, it isn't quite there yet.  So it's tough to dream and wish when there's bills to pay and DW ain't cheap. 
There's another small problem that I believe we can get past the easiest.  The fact that we produce a weekly, timely product and it's just FG and I doing it now is a problem.  We have to figure out how to do two programs in one week.  So it will end up being a ton of work before going on any vacation and a ton of work after we get home.  This will hold true no matter what time we ever take off.  DW isn't a real relaxing vacation either.  We literally drag ourselves out of bed every morning and fall into bed late at night.  Eh, I can sleep when I'm dead.  Now I'm going to soak up every moment of magic with my family as I can.  My poor kids were pushed to limits on both trips. So much so that the first trip when DD was 18 mo, she was throwing up on the way home I think from pure exhaustion.  She's fine now and we had a great time so it didn't do any damage :) 

This is my favorite picture from our trip last year.  It just screams pure joy to me and I cannot get it out of my head to recapture it. (It doesn't help that both kids ask all the time when we get to go back. Like any parent I want to make them happy and it's like a stab in the heart knowing that it's something we all want so very badly!)

10 Things for 2010

I am not a resolution person.  FG makes one every year.  It has been the same several years. Not all in a row, but heck, I've known him long enough now that this one has just come up a few times.  He gives up soda completely. Sometimes only until his birthday in April, other times all year.  He's reached his goal every time.  If he has other resolutions, I don't know what they are because he's kept them to himself.  I just don't make them because I'm weak not that dedicated.   So here's a silly little list of 10 things.

10 THINGS I ENJOY

1. baking/cooking
2. spending summer evenings outside with the family either playing or just relaxing with an ice cream cone/glass of wine watching the kids draw with chalk, ride the bikes, play in the yard
3. watching tv
4. reading
5. snuggling with my kids
6. snuggling with FG
7. playing board games with the kids (as long as they don't freak if someone else wins, which means usually one of them is freaking because they can't BOTH win.)
8. travelling
9. grocery shopping (I know, I'm nuts)
10. entertaining

10 THINGS I DO NOT ENJOY

1. yardwork
2. gardening
3. vacuuming
4. getting up to an alarm clock
5. driving
6. exercising
7. cleaning up after my animals
8. feeling like I yell at my kids too much
9. family meals (this stems from DS's sensory issues and his pickiness about food/eating. I feel like I spend my entire meal telling one kid or the other to stop doing something or to eat or I'm getting up to get moremilkketchuppapertowelstocleanupspills etc.)
10. being in debt/broke

10 SONGS THAT COME UP ON MY IPOD ON SHUFFLE

1. The Memory Remains - Metallica
2. Get Down - Everlast
3. Don't You - Candlebox
4. hit the floor - linkin park
5. Walk This Way - Aerosmith
6. Behind Those Eyes - 3 Doors Down
7. Money Bought - Nickelback
8. Burnin' for you - Blue Oyster Cult
9. Rocket Queen - Guns n Roses
10. Pain - Three Days Grace

(This is too fun - gonna keep going for another 10)

1. All Mixed Up - 311
2. Save Me - Shinedown
3. We Die Young - Alice in Chains
4. Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough - Michael Jackson
5. Empire - Queensryche
6. breakout - foo fighters
7. Bust a Move - Young MC (ohhhh, college, *sigh*)
8. It's Been Awhile - Staind
9. Hot Hot Hot!!! - The Cure
10. Prison Sex - Tool
11. Hump de Bump - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Audioslave came up next. I have several of those as well as several Chili Peppers on there.  I'm totally surprised that Van Halen, Elton John, Motley Crue and Jimi Hendrix didn't come up.  Or my favorite - Son of a Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield didn't come up!  Hmmm, can you say eclectic?

10 FAVORITE FOODS

1. chocolate
2. wine (yes, I count it)
3. tea (again, I count it. I consume enough of it, it gets it's own category. Hot, cold - whatever I'll drink it)
4. my spaghetti sauce
5. steak
6. potatoes
7. cheese
8. pork (I like almost all kinds from sausage to chops)
9. perfect ripe peaches
10. bread

10 FAVORITE TV CHANNELS

1. whichever our show is on ;) gotta keep us in business!
2. Food Network
3. Discovery Channel
4. History Channel
5. A&E
6. ABC (Good Morning America)
7. National Geographic
8. Bravo
9. CBS (been watching Survivor long enough and we love The Amazing Race)
10. HGTV

10 THINGS I WOULD LIKE TO DO IN 2010

1. Go to Disney World in the fall with not only my kids and FG but my parents and MIL as well.  I'm slightly obsessing about it at the moment.
2. Take a trip with just FG - we have one picked out and we are both really really hoping it will be able to happen. If not this year, then maybe in a year for my, gulp, 40th birthday. We'll still take some sort of trip alone this year!
3. Read some better books (right now I read fluff because that's all my brain can handle at night before bed)
4. Learn to like exercise or at least tolerate it more. I'd love to be a runner but I barely enjoy taking my walks!
5. Help FG build our business and get some of it's bills paid down
6. Clean out my file cabinets
7. Hang curtains on the remaining curtain-less windows in our house. It's been over 9 years already, come on, make a decision!
8. Keep trying new recipes and foods.
9. Quit the toystore.
10. Continue to work on being a more tolerant, understanding, better parent.  That's been on my "list" for 9 years. I'm blessed to have these kids, I need to remember that when it gets frustrating.

So those are just some silly little things for 2010.  I'm not going to tag anyone but I'd love to see your lists!  If you do it, leave me a comment here so I can read yours too! 

~~HaPpY NeW YeAr!!!!~~