Blah!

I have been feeling sort of "blah" lately. Just very unsettled. DH started a basketball team. Craziness! His world has never been exactly steady. Never been a 9-5, little risk or reward type world. Nope. It's been lots of risk and sometimes reward! I'm just hoping that this risk comes with reward too. I think it will. I have confidence in him at least. He's good at this stuff. I think I will feel better when things start rolling along and he seems less on edge as well. He's my rock. The only earthquakes I need involving that rock are the kind we create ourselves (wink wink ;0 ).
Then there's the whole FIL and his wife issue. We simply do not like her or trust her. FIL doesn't see what we do. I said something a long time ago to a friend that was pretty rotten about FIL's wife (we'll call her "L"). But at the time, it was said in confidence to a friend and I didn't really mean it to hurt "L" or even get back to her. I didn't even mean for it to BE rotten! I was making an observation. Well, said (ex) friend told "L" that I said this thing and for 8 months, FIL and L have been stewing about it. They decided to let it go but obviously, by the way it's come out and FIL sat on my couch yelling at me the other day, they didn't truly "let it go". So I gave my explanation of why I said what I said and in what context etc. He didn't really listen to my explanation and certainly didn't accept it. He kept telling me that I should have gone and apologized to "L" for ever saying it. I couldn't get him to understand the "L" was never even supposed to hear it so why would I go apologize to her when I only found out a week or so ago that she even KNEW I said it???? See why I have an ulcer and bald spots on my head now? My kids don't even frustrate me that much! Who knows if it will get resolved. "L" wasn't there for the conversation so DH suggested that we have her come over too and start over. Oh joy. Anyone know where I can purchase grain alcohol? Maybe I'll just jump right to heroin because I am going to need some strong stuff to get through that one!

Another reason for the Blahs is the end of summer. I hate the end of summer. I like fall for about two weeks then I'm over it, want the snow to come so I can ski for two weeks then I want summer back. That's really all the season changing I need. My son is in 1st grade and I worry about that and if the school will challenge him enough. Then I worry if I'll survive it or HE will survive it. This weekend I wanted to strangle him. I was seriously ready to send him off to boarding school until my sweet guy could come home and leave that mouthy, nasty little shit there.
My daughter starts a new preschool tomorrow. She is excited. I hope it lasts! I am a bad mom to a second... I nearly forgot about taking the camera and taking her picture. She's done preschool before but this is a new one and yeah, I should take pics of her every year - that would be nice huh?
And I start work. I'm not looking forward to that either. We always said we would keep the family business "family" and so I'm going into the office tomorrow to do some work. I don't wanna!!!! But as my kids get older, I'll just be doing more & more. I guess my first free day in a long time I would rather go do something fun but hey, sitting in a very hot office with my FIL will be great, right? RIGHT???? DH told me he has outside work starting about 1/2 hour from when I get there. Soooo, that leaves me with FIL who at the moment thinks I am the devil. Whoohooo! Fun times ahead!

Hopefully the blahs will go away soon. I am too steady and routine for this sometimes! I need the schedule, need the structure. I'll relax once we get into a good rythm of school and work. And as soon as we get our first serious investor in the new business I'll be able to settle down too. And soon I'll brighten my mood by reliving my fun long weekend. Again, despite the Six year old attitude, it was a great weekend with great friends!